saturday gerek la seyh. sheesh.
ade gig @ arts house.
performance at wheelocks..
and many roads are closed for fireworks.
i did some shopping @ forever 21. and i bought this whitish - pink blouse & white spaghetti.
and for that day it was my first time i wore a simple black tappered jeans , orange white sleeveless dress , black handbag & white havaianas sandals. haha. casual seyh.
thought of going there again next week! can't wait.

splurged countless of energy , on these photos. but very well presumed its not as tiring as compared to TP modelling studio branch, or others. plus, i spent 3 bimbo hours on maths yesterday night. sheesh. as soon as the clock neatly strike 12am, i vommitted out all the food i consumed on the toilet floor. disgusting oke. im so giddy la sey.

physics practical paper i never buat at all. i dont even know how to switch on the fucking circuit! sheesh. x( 15marks gone. i resume on chemistry practical instead.

i very well confirmed you that i akan fail rabak gila punya for my prelims. da la social studies i never even do the essay questions. no time la sey. 13marks gone. yikes. tak bawak ruler pulak tu. so stupid of me.

I cried to death today.
I did not even write up my English paper 1.

and I solemnly created a poem for Ahmad Syazwan. here's a partial..

• I can't find my heart, cause it's there inside u

I can't find my way, cause i'm not beside u

I can't find my smile, cause my happiness is u

this is why i really need u.

I don't care if your're imperfect,

I don't care if your're not the only one,

cause I'm dying in my tears,

you're the one that I want ..

-

And I must say, he's eager to see, to post this to let you all know about him.

• You showed me a sign, you showed me a love I've always thought,

that you're sent from GOD above,

at first you give me so much hope,

but then you give me pain,

why the hell were you so cruel,

you treat me like a fool.

your intentions were unclear,

my heart's burning like a fire,

I just wanna dissapear,

cause now that you're a liar!

-

Its hard to see you as my own friend, it's hard to see you as my own brother even.

AND YES , IM A PERFECT LIAR TOO.

you've yet to hear my side of story; and that's why I deserve this from YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME(:

HAHA. not really 'happy' . partially i guess.
got my M.A.C blusher , skinny jeans & black handbag.

thanks LOADS to these wonderful peoples for wishing me via SMS:

HAFIZ 17th july 23:24pm.
NRL 18th july 00:00am.
HIDAYAT 18th july 07:21am.
ALI 18th july 07:54am.
IBU 18th july 09:35am.
REFDEE 18th july 10:03am.
BRO & GF 18th july 10:36am.
FARHAD 18thjuly 11.21am.
AKID 18thjuly 12.27pm.

And personally shaking hands, wishes & hugs from my classmates & beloved teachers;
BIRTHDAY SONG SANG BY MY CLASSMATES..
AND LOADS OF FRIENDSTER COMMENTS.
love kamu semua!



-
i still remembered how Rusdan used to propose to me on my previous bday. so sweet. but now, look what you've done.. i'm nothing ever since you left me. NO guy seems to suit me well. all they did.. was to hurt & torture my sensitive heart. i guess i deserve this. moreover i did some personal fling with other guy behind your back. that's awful you see.
i even destroyed the love of two hearts. Eddy & Naz. It was'nt really my fault. the main issue is, i didnt even know Naz existed & became Eddy's girlfie all ALONG. and now, they're not together.
I lied countless of times. And now i'm ready for commitment, but then.. i'm fated with none. I'm just a useless girl.

Yesterday140707 was a BLISS!

It was far more crucial than to my phantasm.

Thanks SITI, FARHAD, FAREENA, IQMAL, IFWAT, NRL, LIYANA, DIN, NURAIN, NURASYIKIN, KAK ZEEMA, KAK AZRINA, HY for the advanced birthday gifts.

to the rest like RAFI, SYAH, AMIRA, SALLEHUDIN, HIDAYAT, ALI, RAFIE, HAIQAL, HELMI, ANIS etc for the advanced birthday wishes.

love kamu!

during the party, i'd even collided with other Yusoffians by the sea & my ex-bf (now good friends!) @ the Skyride.

My girlfie, coloured 17 of my fingers white, because 17~ is my fav no.

After the party,
I made my way together with iqmal, ifwat, ali & hidayat to the mrt.
Iqmal & ifwat alight @ BUGIS whilst i, hidayat & ali alight @ C.H. I met up with SITI outside the entrance of M.S.



after that, i met up with AHMADsyazwan.
he brought two of his friends along. moreover, i'm in my not-so-atrocious outfit.
but i only went home with ahmad.
He enjoyed making me jealous! , that is.

Anddd..
he sent me to bukit batok int.
i'd really appreciate that and yeah, am gonna miss him ALOT.

i'm terribly drenched w tears right now.

there's TOO MUCH problems oke! TOOOOOO MUCHHHHH.

stupid rebellious fucking bitch! highly known prostitude! and ouh, with a horny bastard boyfriend!
couples-quarelling! ARGH! ZUL! stop w your dissapearing act will you? Nrl needs you & yet you don't seem to even care? breakups! silent-breakups!
and some guys, never LEARN not to disturb me!
Lack of cash! i'm only left w pathetic 30bucks! how about this saturday?!! TOOT LAAAA..

And now i'm down w a terrible , atrocious flu! i'd never gone for school for like 2 days & i'm fully lacked of knowledge..
I'm taking my damn O levels oke!

urgh.

I'm celebrating my bday in advance this 14th @ Sentosa.

but i presume not many will be able to attend. moreover, i did not even invite that many.
my girlfie; fought w her bf.. which make things even complicated!

moreover w my tight schedule. toot sey.
wednesday, back to woodlands house, rehab centre, causeway point.
thursday, out with girlfies.
and friday, out with girlfie to shop, night course shift 2 @ Almukminin.

sighs.


i miss ahmad.

I'm useless.
I broke people's heart.
I toy-ed with their feelings & rise their emotions.

I made my ibu cry.
a guy cry.
and now, my girlfriend.

even saying to them that Im "attached"(not true) drove them adrift.
I'm such an awful person.
I lost a friend.
I lost the one that i used to love. _efd_e

That's why I deserved to be hurt by people now.
aku mmg beng sey.

BLERGH! So UPSET laa sey .
I spoilt my 2mmDopod phone's LCD. just to fix it, it cost $250!
toot punya apek.
2 days back, i bought a new mobile instead.
And now.. I'm officially broke.

I cant buy new jeans, new cardigan..
Only affordable to buy tanktops or simple shades by next weekend.

-

ai sey kwee kwee.
i'm back laa sey.
haha.

finally, i FEEL like blogging. (: as a matter of fact, i enjoyed TOO MUCH in the outside world till.. I actually don't bother to tell tales here.

but hell, i don't think anybody is interested?!

so yea, school.. been really awfully sucky. :( AND... I fractured my right hand. LOL. i had super duper hard time trying to write. ahh..uh! but still, stubborn as usual.

i spent too much quality time w/ Nrl, Zul, Reena & Ahmad..and i left most of the others out. Sorry guys. I'll get back to you soon. ( i think ) haha.